SCREAMS of the WEIGHING machine!!!!!she glances down frantically with beads of sweat dripping down from her face like a river. (RIVER?!!!). The needle swings violently without any signs or damping. Each agonizing second passes by. WHEN IS IT GONA STOP. WHEN?!The moment of truth comes when the needle comes to a halt.She can't believe what she see, thinking it must be her decrepited eyesight at fault.THERE RIGHT INFRONT OF HERyes its every girl's nightmare!THE WEIGHING MACHINE.yes yes. every gal would agree with me. haha the torment. after one weighs her weight she would go on a starvation strike for a couple of days before surrendering to food am i right?
but well for me... the agony's the same! only except..
I HAVE TO START STUFFING MYSELF WITH LOADS OF FOOD TO
GAIN WEIGHT!!ohhh man. here are ppl desperately trying to lose their weight. while me desperately trying to gain some!! haha u may ask why? but the feeling is the same.much as you ppl feel the pain in being fat, i feel the pain in being skinny.much as u dont want ppl to comment about u being fat, i dont like ppl commentin that im skinny either.the pissing thing is that they think i dont eat. but prob is I LOVE FOOD. for the love of god n food. I LOVE FOOD TOO MUCH TO NOT- NOT EAT. n i jus had the 4 pc pepper drumlets from mc for lunch. 
ignore my ugly feet please. hoho they have their ugly times too.
42kg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ACCORDING TO THE SCALE. IM FINALLY YES. 42kg!!WAHAHHA one more kg and i can be heavier than someone in my class. anyway. i dont know if the is lying to me or not cause my sis told me that she weighed 46kg at her workplace (two weighing machines showed the same) and at this maching she weighed 48!! so maybe my weight may be 42-2=40kg :((( back at 40 again sigh. MAYBE? MAYBE NOT. not sureLIZARDS ON CHICK-LETSwas having dinner out with my old folks when i saw something that really disturbed me.anyway i was having dinner at some stall famous for its chicken wings. supposedly loads of food critics have visited the stall before includin makan sutra- seetoh.well you see. the disturbing thing was...*DRUMROLLS*
down at the welcome sign... LIZARDS!! yea not one but two! but currently the pic only shows one. the other prob ran off to the side. anyway its so unappetising!!
THERE IT IS. this HUGE SIGNBOARD of their FAMOUS CRISPY CHICKEN WING and this lizard is there!!now i know why theres the 'ALL ARE WELCOME' phrase below. cause ALL are really welcomed.anyway Ms. Critic Andrea Drusilla Blake( goddess of judgement- Feeding the Armadillo) says...
3 out of 5 yummy faces!
haha the chiken was not bad i guess crispy. and the mifen not too dry (:
gssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.so far i have bought1) a top from mng2)a top from zara3) a pair of earrings from topshopthats bout it. blahhtill next time. toodles!!
♥ 8:45:00 PM
angelina jolie gave birth yesterday in africa to
Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt
A BABY GIRL!!she will turn out to be a beauty. woah. imagine that.
went shopping ystd with gerri aft the college day function. (:
bought a mng top and a pair of earrings from topshop.
the earrings are gorgeous.! grrrrrr.
tuesday night at MoS young designers award. Vaunt. hmmm
n i managed to buy triple choclate CEREAL FROM MARKS AND SPENCERS!!!
YUMYUM YUM. !!
♥ 11:18:00 AM
happy HaPpY Happy HAppy HAPPY HAPPYYYY!!!today was fantastic, i can only use one word to describe everything and that is - magical.everything was worth it. for that brief moment, we made the stage ours, we owned the place, we kicked ass. and we were more than awesome.....we were BRILLANT.lets start with 2005...
i rmb durin the dec hols we met constantly twice a week in sch to start our syf piece. we borrowed books from the library n eventually settled on feeding the armadillo. Times at mpr5 with darling Lydia (: ohhhh!!we also had the fun dance (: was fun teachin it to the masses.then came 2006auditions for syf with Mr Sas, finally meetin our coach Desmond who was god sent includin Mr. Sas. Cast was selected and rehersals were on goin but things were still a little out of hand- we all werent fully commited to it yet.then came march , april then may. (after the common tests)MONTH OF MAY
i still remember how HARD we worked our asses away. gettin chased by the security guard EVERYDAY. leavin the sch at 9pm at the same time having to cope with the studies and exams. HOW MUCH TIME N MONEY SPENT ON THE PROPS. how much effort we put in, trainings at the hall with desmond. How many lectures we recieved. how many tears were shed. how many criticisms were made at us. or how many quarrels we all had amongst each other...and the time we spent with the SWEET j1s (: thanks for tolerating us and hangin there with us. AND THE BACKSTAGE CREW <3333<>
our secrets at the staircase. and the hot seat with sweaty butt marks. of how we wld laugh at each other's actions. minas. taitais. perfection. how we wld go all loony and crazy - oooooing and aaaing.to just think that two days ago we were still worried we couldnt make it thru syf. but we did guys... we all did and im so proud of all of you...............i cnt express how much i feel.... and god was with us..... u were right ush..... he was there all along. watching us (:
MOST OF ALL I REALLY ENJOYED EVERY MOMENT. I REALLY DID AND I WONT FORGET THIS DAY. ALL OF IT WAS WORTHWHILE AND I LOVE U GUYS LIKE MY FAMILY. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU MADE IT POSSIBLE. WE BONDED, WE CRIED, WE SCREAMED, WE CHEERED, WE FOUGHT, WE SMILED, WE HUGGED AND LASTLY....
WE SHINED.lets say we find some day to have dinner with Mr Sas and Desmond kayys!!!! (:
andddddddd
another thing to be happy about is that my sis is back from u.s!! she bought loads of stuff for me too wahahahah. (:
be jealous man :PPPPP :O! haha jus kiddin xP
i got my guess ring i wanted.
ignore my ugly fingers! its bling bling oooh (:
got a hellokitty notepad from japan
a MnMs glittery heart shaped keychain from MnMs world (Las Vegas)
MAC LIPGLOSS AH. its freakin cheap there
Nyc makeup set + sally hansen nail polish
marykate and ashley glitter powder.
earrings from claires - i still duno which to choose the white or the black??
u.s seventeen mag
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE...
spongebob n patrick merchandise!! OOOOO
1. spongebob colgate toothpaste bubblegum flavour
2.Carebear - Good luck bear (my sis bought it for me for the A's awww. super sweet n touched la!)
3. and 4. Spongebob and Patrick WALL WALKER!! yes . u know the thingie u use to play when u were young. u jus need to throw it at a wall n it starts walking down
5. and 6. Spongebob and Patrick SLINKY! yes the thingie that can pe pulled apart w/o breakin and walks down a staircase! looks like a spring :D
all i love her so muccchhh (: anyways. IM HAPPY SO COMe ON MAMA.
♥ 6:03:00 PM
i taste my tears while i pen this down,
how long more till both my feet can be unbound?
with eyes of hate, grief and fear
i stare up harshly at the sky.
oh lord are you ignoring me,
my pathetic pleads, cant you see?
drowned in a pool full of emotions
i cant seem to swim at all
i tried to stand up but in the end i fall.
im swimming around alone
no ones helping, no.
no one can save me.
till i learn how to swim,
i may just get a chance to swim towards the very end
but sadly ill drown before i get a chance to learn to swim.
In this solitude, oh how i yearn for a lil comfort
but no one bothers to ask about it
assumptions are made before im judged.
things are a mess.
wished i could worry less.
the tough preparations and turmoils.so much more to do even though we have already put down our 1000%the tiredness.the pain from my crampshow sick i feel evryday from all the coughing and sneezingoh how stressed up everyday is.or how my tears wont stop as im writing this.how we have to face our mistakes and humbly get scrutinized.yes i know thats necessary for improvements and i gladly welcome it.but sometimes it does make one feel tired.coming home would mean rest.my home is my heaven.last thing i would want is my dad yelling at me because of some ridiculous reason.cant you understand?i know you want the best for me.but yelling at me will only make me feel worse.its like lashing out at a child who is naked bare and unprotected.it only makes me feel pissed and sad.in turn only crushing my LAST wall of sanity and emotional barrier.just when my defence is the lowest - (i expected to find comfort n emotional support from my family)it only makes me weaker inside.worsens my health even more as grief tugs on towards me, refusing to let go.torn apart in my heartmy tears are stil flowin endlessly even after three hours of what has happened.its the last straw i can take. just a small little lashing will result in a outburst of emotions in me. i cant just stop crying. does anyone even know , how much.
every night.
♥ 11:59:00 PM
aya_splashy112@hotmail.com.